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- You count the number of sprinkles on each kid’s cupcake to make sure they are equal.
- You want to take out a contract on the kid who broke your child’s favorite toy and made him/her cry.
- You have time to shave only one leg at a time.
- You hide in the bathroom to be alone.
- You hire a baby sitter because you haven’t been out with your husband in ages, then you spend half the night talking about and checking on the kids.
- You hope ketchup is a vegetable because it’s the only one your child eats.
- You find yourself cutting your husband’s sandwiches into unusual shapes.
- You fast-forward through the scene when the hunter shoots Bambi’s mother.
- You can’t bear to give away baby clothes–it’s so final.
- You hear your mother’s voice coming out of your mouth when you say, “Not in your good clothes.”
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